I am happy!

it’s spring where I live, the sun is gaining power again, I’m back at university after some years of hard work, I have an amazing boyfriend (although we are apart, but we will be together in the line-up again in less than four weeks), I will move to my new apartment in may and… I am happy! I’m really truly happy at the moment. the past years haven’t been easy and I forgot how it feels to be HAPPY! I’m so thankful that I am at the moment! I know that rollercoaster-life will have many ups and downs for me in the future, but I am finally able to savor every minute of my present happiness and it feels so damn good! :) I hope you are alright out there – enjoy it if you can! lots of sunhine to you -steph

blue kiwi

“you get out there, wait all day and jockey around until you get the wave. you make a couple of flashy maneuvers and come through a section that no one thinks you can make. you finish with flair at the whitewash end – and all of this for nothing, because when it’s done it’s gone. surfing is sort of a zen exercise, the philosophy of action being everything and result’s nothing. that’s the joy of surfing… to understand being in the moment.” (john milius)

thx for this one, ben! have fun in bali and see ya next year in sri lanka! ;*

 

really? like really really?

somewhere in a capitalistic state a girl with a university degree and a nice job decides to leave everything behind – to gain some more salt water experiences in the developing world. she’s very lucky, because her family is backing her all the way.

her friends? some are cool with it, some think it’s cool and some might say she’s a total freak. “you will give up your job?” really? like really really? YES! with a big smile on my face! because I feel it! and at least I should try, no?

and then there are travel-companions who understand you lock, stock and barrel! and they also have some very important words for you that bring you back down to mother earth’s ground:

“just remember that your capitalist job pays for your vacation to diverse 3rd world countries… otherwise you would be ‘living’ 3rd world… which is not nearly as exotic as ‘passing through’ 3rd world – it’s a catch 22, I know…”

thank you so damn f****** much, my dear friend! and to say it with rocky leon’s words: “the sun is shining and the grass is green, so quit your whining…” & “maybe you shouldn’t work anymore…” :)

in between

have you ever felt like not knowing exactly where you belong to? which part of a country or which country at all you want to live in? which way the right one for yourself is? I guess I’m always feeling like that and always thinking about that when I return from a journey…

I have just returned from Istanbul and Israel, the first I spent four days at, the latter I had ten days to discover. far too few, if you ask me. or anybody. but it was long enough to start thinking about my life again. and now I am packing for Indonesia, my next surftrip, starting on saturday. I am really, really looking forward to catch some waves again, being in the line-up, waiting for sets… for me it’s carpe diem at its best there.

but… and that is a really stupid thought perhaps… I am afraid of the returning after three weeks. because I know that it will be hard. hard to be in a rainy country again, without shores. hard to live a 9 to 5 life again. hard to deal with all those tiny problems we use to complain about.

and every time I return, I come up with naive daydreams about going abroad. the question now is: am I allowed to manipulate destiny? or is it the other way round and paths are only created, when I walk them…?